League of Utah Writers Published Book Contest Scoring Sheet

FOUNDING SHERIFF   Score 93
COVER
Is the cover appealing?  Does it represent the work?  Does the back-cover blurb lead you to read the book?
Score 1-15:  13
Comments: As usual with Five Star, the book cover gives us a glimpse of what’s inside.
MECHANICS/EDITING/FORMATTING
Are there issues with grammar, spelling, punctuation, or formatting?  (Judge may give some wiggle room for voice, but none of these areas should feel wrong.)
Score 1-15:  13
Comments:  Bottom 283, I believe this was an editor’s note not addressed. Otherwise, I don’t understand the CC etc. in the text. (Note: I thank the judge for spotting this. Five Star’s proofreaders have now corrected the problem and it will not appear in the publshed volume.)
HOOK
Does the first chapter/section of the book make you want to read more?
Score 1-10:  10
PLOT (for Fiction)
Was the plot/topic interesting?  Did you notice any major holes or unanswered questions? For speculative fiction, was the world-building/science understandable and integrated well into the plot?  Did the pacing feel natural?
Score 1-15:  15
Comments:  I followed the plot with interest. We have layers of tension as plot builds to final conclusion. Nicely done.
WRITING/VOICE
Rate the writing/prose.  Was it easy to follow?  Was it interesting?  Was there a distinct voice? Did it fit with the age category and genre of the book?
Score 1-15:  13
Comments: In Part IV, this reader had difficulty with all the new names and characters. I had difficulty sorting good from bad.
INTEREST
Did this book keep your interest throughout?  Was the subject matter and the manner in which it was presented interesting?
Score 1-15: 14
Comments: I liked the sheriff, and enjoyed reading about the relationship between sheriff and his wife. No drama here, only a loving relationship between two people—an element that distinguishes this novel from most modern fiction.
OVERALL
Give this book an overall rating.  Would you recommend this book to someone who enjoys this genre?
Score 1-15: 15
Comments:  Hope my comments help in some way. Good luck with your writing.

Goodreads, Vicky Rose, review

“It’s just after the Civil War in Utah Territory when a vicious killer shoots his young, pregnant wife, steals her pa’s guns and takes out in grandma’s buggy. He’s hasn’t reckoned on Sheriff Luke Simms, a Mormon sheriff who routs out evil with the same patient determination he exhibits at his other occupation as a cooper making barrels. A transplanted Englishman, Luke uses a cane and rifle to bring the wife killer to justice, but justice takes her sweet time in bringing about a conviction. The killer uses every legal trick and maneuver he can think of to delay his trial, and although Sheriff Simms gets aggravated, he never gives up on the justice system.

“In the meantime, the sheriff must deal with Indian hysteria and overbearing railroad officials. The author has a way with phrases, “The homestead …. called a cattle ranch amounted to little more than a fight with the high mountain desert.” And his portrayal of a manipulation sociopathic killer is especially well drawn.

“If you are looking for a little bit different kind of western, where reason and common sense rule amidst the Mormons of Utah Territory, then this is the book for you.”